Safe-Quip Racing Products
The World's Fastest Clown's
Official Safety Equipment Supplier!

The CG-Lock is the best way to turn your factory (OEM) lap belt into a performance driving belt! The World's Fastest Clown uses them in his Austin Mini Turbo, hang on!
Order from CG-Lock and mention The World's Fastest Clown when you register it, they'll make a donation to our prevention campaign!


Back-to-Back-to-Back-to-Back-to-Back-to-Back Champions
Grassroots Motorsports Magazine
$1500 and $2001 Overall Challenge Champions
$2002 Challenge under $1,000 Champions
$2003 Challenge under $1,000 Champions
$2004 Challenge under $1,000 Champions
$2005 Challenge under $1,000 Champions

The under 1K Challenger, the
Nissan 343 Coop!
Yes, that is a chicken in place
of the battery!

Our MGVC won the first two Challenges, but we only had $6.00 left in our building budget; what's the challenge when you can't make many improvements for the $2002 Challenge? So Team TOBACCO FREE! decided to start over with a new car. When the rules and classes were announced, we decided we were going to go for the "top finishing car under $1,000" while trying to finish in the top 3 overall ($2,002 cars). Now that's a challenge!

Six months prior to the event, we saved 3 1985ish Nissan 300ZX's from Code Enforcement in front of a chicken coop. The cost was 3 for $300 (343). The chickens were removed from the cars and left to deal with Code Enforcement without the wheels to escape. Two of the cars were towed and the third car was driven at 20 mph (LOUD banging under the car) to their new home, The World's Fastest Clown's home.
The Nissan 343 Coop was born....

About 1,500 hours and $979.77 later we had built
The World's Fastest and Best Looking Nissan "Chicken" Coop!

The "working" car was full of water and bugs (windows were down for 2 months in the Florida rain), had no reverse, was HIT on the left front and right rear, the bottom of the car had damage from off-road driving, the shocks/struts were shot, and of course some rust. On the bright side it had a "newish" timing belt, radiator, injectors (Nissan recall) and master cylinders.

Many of the modifications/creations are linked to this page for your viewing entertainment. As you can see by just the front of the car, creativity and 2 parts cars came in handy. For example, the bottom half of the nose is a nose off of a parts car that was turned upside-down and bolted to the original nose. We also used the headlight covers from both parts cars to fill in the headlight openings; the "working" headlights are mounted in the trunk for ballast but are easily transferred to the "original" location for night or rain driving. Have you ever used a 5 gallon "Jerry" gas can as a fuel cell, we did with the original in-tank fuel pump. Enjoy...

The engine...
The interior...
The nose...
The fuel cell/gas can...
Adjustable fuel pressure...

The engine stabilizer...
The battery box...
Bodywork, yuk!
Just for fun...
The Team!

Smoking the Competition
Not Tobacco